Girls, Let’s Talk about Sext

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 Publisher’s Note*  Sexting has become a worldwide issue and Northeast Texas is not immune to the problem. This four part series, written by a local young adult, seeks to address the issue on a personal level.
Tyler Pickle is a DeKalb High graduate currently attending Texas A&M. He is  a video journalist for 12th Man Productions, the middle man between the athletic department and ESPN, specializing in softball. Pickle is a Sport Management major with a double minor in journalism and communications. He has previously written for Odyssey, the largest website with articles written exclusively by students. 

By Tyler Pickle

In the second part of this four-part series, girls, it’s your turn. I do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings or embarrass anyone in writing this, but because I’m talking directly to people I care about immensely, I’m also not going to sugar coat anything. Our society has set our women up for failure. Society tells our women that nothing is enough. Society tells our women that their body is a weapon. Society tells our women that how they feel doesn’t matter. Unfortunately, more times than not, our women listen to society. That is a choice that our ladies have. Are you going to take the easy route, or start a movement? Whether the young men in their lives believe this or not, our young ladies are constantly feeling like they don’t live up to what society says they should be doing. Every woman feels like she isn’t what her man wants, and that she isn’t enough. To try to live up to these ridiculously unrealistic expectations, our young ladies are doing things they don’t want to do, but feel like they need to. As a man, I’m telling you that it isn’t your responsibility to meet these false expectations (and if you are with someone who has these expectations, you may need to take a look at who you’re dating). With that being said, you shouldn’t feed into these expectations by using your body as a tool to get what you want. As almost every woman has probably figured out by now if they’re old enough to read this, guys are stupid and will do just about anything if you give them something. I’m all for expressing love, but by using your body to gain love, or to get something else you want, you are disvaluing your body and creating a male society that is okay with this. If you think that sending a boy a naked picture will make him fall in love with you, you don’t understand what love is. If you are simply trying to get a man to lust after you, that’s an entirely different problem that you should also address. I want to tell you that how you feel matters. I always tell people, never apologize for your feelings. How you feel is how you feel, and that’s okay. If you ever say, “I’m sorry for not feeling like this is right.”, you are approaching it the wrong way. If you don’t want to do something, don’t apologize, stand by it. You’re not sorry for feeling that way. By allowing guys to change your opinions of yourself, your relationships, and your body, you are essentially allowing him to steal everything that makes you who you are.  As I mentioned in the first part of this series, this issue is four-pronged between the parents, the school system, the guys, and, yes, the girls. However, the ‘blame’, if you even want to call it that, is undoubtedly spread throughout the four parties. Do not get me wrong, the young women are not always in the right, but it is also not entirely their fault. It isn’t anyone’s fault. As we grow as a people and as we grow as a society, we are figuring this stuff out. So, don’t say, “Well, that  whore sent the pictures, what did she expect?” Instead, let’s look at why she felt she needed to, or why she wanted to, or what we can do to fix it. I’m not suggesting we look for excuses, I’m suggesting we look for solutions. I want to see us grow as a society, and that starts with the young women. Ladies, let’s make it happen.

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